Actual News*

*:based on actual news



In the latest of a string of gun-related incidents in downtown Lawrence, a KU football player was threatened with a gun last week outside of the Thai House (700 block of Mass. St.). Cornerback Aqib Talib was riding in a truck driven by former KU football player Mark Simmons when it was backed out of a parking space and was surrounded by a crowd. Aubrey E. Gilbert, 23, of Lawrence, allegedly pointed a gun at Talib. Gilbert was struck and run over by the truck, according to police. "The vast majority of the time, downtown is safe," said Mayor Mike Amyx. "We just have these incidents pop up. Our goal is to have things in place to deal with these problems."*:The Lawrence City Commission is now threatening to re-examine the Thai House's curry license.


President Bush threatened to veto the Iraq supplemental funding bill that passed both the House and the Senate if it still included a timetable for troop redeployment when it arrived at his desk. Republicans in the Senate opted not to filibuster the bill, as they had when it was last up for a vote, forcing Bush to oppose the legislation on his own. If he were to veto the funding, it would be only the second veto of his presidency. "Members of Congress need to stop making political statements and start providing vital funds for our troops," Bush said at a press conference the day after the bill passed. House Speaker Nancy Pelosi responded, "On this very important matter, I would extend a hand of friendship to the president, just say to him, 'Calm down with the threats, there's a new Congress in town. We respect your constitutional role. We want you to respect ours.' This war must end."*:Democratic leaders urged President Bush to seek common ground. "For example," said Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, "we can both agree on how shocking it is that Congress finally grew some balls and stood up to the executive branch."


A bill to expand gambling was approved by the Kansas Legislature last week and delivered to Gov. Kathleen Sebelius, who promised to sign it into law, breaking a 15-year losing streak for the measure. Supporters of the bill filibustered in the Senate while they tried to round up enough support. Sen. Marci Francisco (D-Lawrence) talked for approximately three hours by reading feasibility studies on casinos in Kansas. The tactic worked and the bill passed 21-19. Proponents say the bill will generate up to $200 million annually for education funding. Opponents view the bill as endorsing a social ill. "We will see good jobs eliminated. We will see families destroyed, and we will see communities suffer for the enrichment of a few," said Sen. Phil Journey (R-Haysville)*:Opponents of the bill had to cut their arguments against gambling short as Powerball numbers were about to be announced.



An aide for Sen. Jim Webb (D-Virginia) was arrested last week on charges of bringing a firearm into a Senate office building. Phillip Thompson, a former marine and long-time assistant to Webb, was carrying a loaded handgun with two clips of ammo in his briefcase. The gun belonged to Webb and Thompson claims he was carrying the wrong briefcase by accident. "Everyone here knows that I am a strong supporter of the Second Amendment, that I have had a permit to carry a weapon in Virginia for a long time," said Webb.*:Webb justified the firearm as protection, especially considering he had just been invited on a hunting trip by the vice president's office.



Presidential spokesman Tony Snow announced last week that his cancer has returned and spread to his liver and elsewhere in his body. Snow, 51, had his colon removed in 2005 and underwent six months of chemotherapy after being diagnosed with colon cancer. He underwent surgery on Monday to remove a growth in his abdominal area, near the site of the original cancer, and doctors determined it to be metastasized cancer. His diagnosis came less than a week after Elizabeth Edwards, wife of Democratic presidential hopeful John Edwards, announced that her cancer had returned.*:These latest developments offer further evidence that the disease is bipartisan and opportunistic-yet another reason why Joe Lieberman is like cancer.



Eight British sailors and seven marines are being held captive in Iran after they were detained by Iranian forces last week. They were seized by Iranian naval units near the mouth of the Shatt al-Arab, a waterway that has long been a disputed dividing line between Iraq and Iran. Iran insists the sailors illegally entered its waters, but Britain says the team was in Iraqi waters at the time of their capture. President Bush on Saturday demanded the release of the 15 "hostages." He said they were innocent and called their capture "inexcusable behavior." British Prime Minister Blair said "there is only one possible solution to this, and that is that our personnel are returned safe and sound." Iran's top military official, Gen. Ali Reza Afshar, called it an "aggression into the Islamic Republic of Iran's waters."*:Everyone involved was really embarrassed when the whole affair was revealed as a publicity stunt for Disney's upcoming "Pirates of the Carribean: Curse of Ahmadinejad's Beard."


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