BREAKING NEWS
…All Hail Goulet edition!!!
Monday, May 5, 2008
Big hail fell on 17th Street at 5:58 p.m. on May 1. Car alarms began sounding in the parking lot of a fraternity. A resident clothed in a T-shirt, shorts and flip-flops screamed in mock agony and climbed atop a sport utility vehicle, yelling “help.” A similarly clothed fraternity boy ran across the parking lot to stop one of the alarms.
A dapper old man in nice slacks and a white dress shirt passed by. He glanced at the fraternity boy causing the commotion before transferring his eyes to a nonchalant check of his watch and continuing down the street, apparently impervious to the heavy hailstorm he found himself in the middle of.
The time has now come for the latest installment of Reading Time, a regular feature of Breaking News. From page 198 of “Ghosts at the Table,” a recently published book about professional poker players by Des Wilson:
Photo by Frank Tankard
“On the outskirts of Las Vegas, not far from the airport, there is a community the millions of tourists never see. It’s hidden behind high walls and the gates are manned by security guards. Behind these walls are expensive ranch houses and haciendas. Water sprinklers keep the grass outside these homes green all year round; swimming pools keep their owners cool. The cars parked outside are the best. It’s peaceful and it’s exclusive and it’s where Billy Baxter lives, down the road from Robert Goulet and Wayne Newton.”
The scrupulous reader will note that Robert Goulet died last year, presumably after the book was written but before it was published. If you thought we wouldn’t notice this oversight, Da Capo Press, you were wrong. Please send a corrected copy to the address found on page 3 of this publication.
The wind blew strongly and an old woman downwind from the listener spoke softly, unable to be heard. A Volvo that was parked on Seventh Street had little wipers on its headlights. News was scarce.
—All facts in this story are real. Got a breaking news tip? Email Frank Tankard at frank@lawrence.com. UcanDewIT!
Dead Meadow :: This Matador Records trio plays overdriven sets of distorted drone rock with dashes of doom metal, wah-guitar psychedelia and lumbering Crazy Horse jams ... More info
- Animale / KTP
- Runaway Sons / The Black Hollies / Little Lost and Innocents
- That Damn Sasquatch / Big Cat KS
Comments
lawrence.com does not necessarily agree with comments posted below - responsibility lies with the relevant user alone. Read our full policy
Post a comment
(Requires free lawrence.com registration.)