The Bark of the Moral Universe

Actual News Nug*

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This puppy is a socialist who will impose Islamo-Fascist Sharia law upon your children and take away your guns.

Fulfilling his election night promise to his daughters, President Obama and his family have finally settled upon a dog for the White House. The first family will be receiving a Portuguese water dog as a gift from Senator Ted Kennedy. Sasha and Malia Obama have decided to name the dog Bo.

*…In an embarrassing turn of events, it was revealed the puppy owes thousands of dollars in back taxes.

And in another hurdle that needs to be overcome before the White House can receive the dog, Vice President Biden must be neutered and dewormed.

Top 20 Other Pets Considered by Obama Family

1. Hamster

2. Iguana

3. Ferret

4. Parakeet

5. Electric eel

6. Badger

7. Wildebeest

8. Feral dingo

9. Pregnant hippo

10. Starving grizzly bear

11. Velociraptor

12. Bull elephant in heat

13. Bovine spongiform encephalopathy virus

14. Glenn Beck

15. Face eating chimpanzee

16. Basket of week-old dead kittens

17. Hyper-intelligent shark with gun that shoots piranhas

18. Decepticon

19. Pony with AIDS

20. Chinchilla

*...based on actual news

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