Monday, September 14, 2009
My God. There are no words. You know why there are no words? Because this guy used them all in his name. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...
Julius Andreas Gimli Arn MacGyver Chewbacka Highlander Elessar-Jankov!
Via Norwegian site VG Net, Mr. Gimli Arn MacGyver Chewbacka Highlander Elessar-Jankov (formerly Andreas Jankov) legally changed his name because he "wanted to show that it is possible to be serious and at the same time take the name you like."
All of the names come from fictional pop culture characters except for "Julius," who is a famed chimp at the Kristiansand Zoo. "He is cool, found on a lot of mischief, and is also a very good artist," says Gimli Arn MacGyver Chewbacka Highlander Elessar-Jankov of his simian namesake (at least according to the amusing Google translation). Tolkein/Star Wars/Richard Dean Anderson/Scottish immortal nerds can figure out the rest of the name. "Arn" is a Swedish film about a knight...dur.
Inspired by Julius Andreas Gimli Arn MacGyver Chewbacka Highlander Elessar-Jankov's devil-may-care disregard for society's stultifying rules about name length, the proper spelling of Chewbacca, and ginger goatees, I shall henceforth only respond to...
Batman Gavon Chester A. Arthur Batman Simon And Simon Brenda Starr Laessig Batman, Esq.!
You know you can't come up with a cooler name, so don't even try (okay, try).
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gavon (Gavon Laessig) says…
Alternate: "Gavon Popeye Doyle Guy Gardener Buddy Bradley Jumanji Laessig"
chewyfally (Falestine Afani Ruzik) says…
Alternate: "Fally Falcor Pootie Tang Sanka Zamunda Child Like Empress."
pistachio (anonymous) says…
Uh, point of order... you aren't an esquire. I'll let you be Her Royal Highness (HRH) instead though.
Sincerely,
Señor Perry Night Court M&Ms Lionel Hutz Batman Birdman L.A. Law Mason
headbandrew (Andrew P. Witt) says…
Monsieur Andrew Leonidas "Tacos at Midnight" TruFlat Merkwürdigeliebe-Venkman of Basementland
Keith (anonymous) says…
He'll never top this.
Malcolm Peter Brian Telescope Adrian Umbrella Stand Jasper Wednesday (pops mouth twice) Stoatgobbler John Raw Vegetable (sound effect of horse whinnying) Arthur Norman Michael (blows squeaker) Featherstone Smith (blows whistle) Northgot Edwards Harris (fires pistol, then 'whoop') Mason (chuff-chuff-chuff-chuff) Frampton Jones Fruitbat Gilbert (sings) 'We'll keep a welcome in the' (three shots, stops singing) Williams If I Could Walk That Way Jenkin (squeaker) Tiger-drawers Pratt Thompson (sings) 'Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head' Darcy Carter (horn) Pussycat (sings) 'Don't Sleep In The Subway' Barton Mainwaring (hoot, 'whoop') Smith
via Python.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
Fuck y'all.
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DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
Word wrap fail.