Dear USPS,

Here's something that consistently gets my goat, chaps my hide, and gnaws on my brainstem (3fer!)....WHY does every damnable post office in this country have to be such a pain in the (chapped) keister?

USPS, if you want to, say, perhaps, I don't know, compete in this GLOBAL MARKET VILLAGE ECONOMY, perhaps you might staff your locations with more than two workers at any given time. I've often wondered why there are even five to six counters in most locations anyway. Perhaps they are just for show? Maybe that's where they keep the GOOD mail, x-rayed packages of chocolate, gold, and gold-covered chocolate. Maybe that's where they keep their valium and pot because no one who works at the post office EVER moves more than .2 mph. Ever.

So, maybe instead of raising postage in ridiculously stupid increments (make it even, damn you!), you could compete with FedEx and UPS not with flat-rate boxes, but with better G.D. service. Stop with the Grandma Moses, Chatty Cathy shenanigans and give New Orleans back its Automated Postal Centers while you're at it. I realize it's hard to make a machine read a new $5 bill, but I believe in you. U.S.A.! U.S.A!

Comments

DOTDOT 13 years, 1 month ago

Why is it that service was better when stamps were cheaper?

Jill Ensley 13 years, 1 month ago

Because those were the free-wheeling days of the past, Dots. EVERYTHING was better then. That, or I have no idea.

Megan Green Stuke 13 years, 1 month ago

I detest going inside the post office. It's infuriating. Almost as much as I detest the DMV. No, to be fair, the DMV gets me in and out faster than the PO, and they have to take my damn picture and give me a test.

lazz 13 years, 1 month ago

I now think of going to the Post Office as patience practice. A weekly booster shot of temper control.

Jill Ensley 13 years, 1 month ago

Lazz, that's a really good way of looking at it actually. Unfortunately, I live in a city that is one big giant patience practice. Thiiiinnnngs mooove sloooowwerrrrr dowwn herrrrrrrrrr.....which is both good and bad.

alm77 13 years, 1 month ago

Our HyVee and Dillons are not satellite post offices. YaY!! I never have to wait in line. You should check into that down there.

paavopetie 13 years, 1 month ago

At 45 cents, it costs around 1/20th to send a letter as it would with fed ex or ups. All post offices now have those automated machines in the lobby, which is open 24 hours a day. You've just got to make sure your package is less than 13 ounces, otherwise you'll just have to drop it off while someone is there. You don't even have to wait in line to do that!

paavopetie 13 years, 1 month ago

My point is, that you get what you pay for. Although free Saturday delivery is a bonus that UPS charges extra for and Fed Ex doesn't even touch.

PatrickJoseph 13 years, 1 month ago

…and Jill, does UPS or FedEx make Charles and Ray Eames stamps? Boom. Also, in the Vermont Post office, I have witnessed four, yes four, employees attending to the line before.

Jill Ensley 13 years, 1 month ago

paavo, dammit man, read! NOLA post offices don't have Automated Centers. They took them out because they couldn't read the new $5 bills. That, of course, is a rumor, and is most likely untrue. More likely is that they couldn't be bothered to tell people how to use them.

Patrick, you lie. Was it a full moon? Leap year? I don't believe you. And true, I do love the Muppets stamps.

Jill Ensley 13 years, 1 month ago

Also, I was referring to packages re: FedEx/UPS vs. USPS. Who the crap mails a letter at FedEx or UPS? I guess if you're Mr. Business and need it there STAT! Quickly, man! Business!

alm77 13 years, 1 month ago

My post should say "are now" not "are not"... sigh

Kelly Corcoran 13 years, 1 month ago

I've very few qualms with the USPS. I consider it a minor miracle that letters actually show up at the proper destination for 45 cents.

When I end up waiting in line, its usually caused by someone in line who can't grasp some detail about the process. Sure, sometimes the postal workers at the downtown post office get a little chatty. Diane likes to talk. You just want a stamp. I figure a return of the automated stamp machine fixes the problem, no?

Q: Why doesn't the postage just go to 50 cents and stay there for years to come? A: Congressional Oversight.

Megan Green Stuke 13 years ago

What I really hate is going there with one of those pink "certified mail" slips and waiting for half an hour to pick up my package while people stand in line to buy stamps and chat. However, I have to give them credit; usually, when the line is particularly long, a manager or someone appears from the back and yells out to those of us with mail pick up slips to come out of line, and he helps us himself. If we're lucky.

paavopetie 13 years ago

godjilla, sorry i overlooked your bitching about a lack of automated postage centers in new orleans. but why are you giving a rat's ass about that? you're a small town blogger complaining about something in a city a thousand miles away. that doesn't make sense to me.

but to follow your line of argument, let me go off on a rant about Milton's...

G.D. it Milton's! Every time I try to bring my fiance there to have breakfast, you are always way too crowded! Why don't you take over more space from the store next to you and try expanding your business to meet the demand? And the waitresses are always to nice and chatty. They should just serve people their food and then ask them to leave as soon as they are done. I don't like waiting! Wah, wah.

Jill Ensley 13 years ago

paav, oh snap, you called me out. I thought the USPS' turtle-like service would be a universal topic. But you know what opinions are like...

Why don't you just bitch honestly about Milton's instead of punctuating it with fake whinery? Isn't that what the internet is for? Nothing wrong with a little venting, my friend...except when people take it too seriously.

I mean, Milton's is great, but they DO need a bigger space. My complaint is that they're not really a coffee shop any more. No self-respecting java house closes at 3pm.

Jill Ensley 13 years ago

Oh, and p.s. douchetroll....how's Kansas City treatin' ya.

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