May 29, 2009
Usually, I don't encounter a lot of snobbery centered around where I'm from down here. I mean, it's the South, easily mockable and they know it. Or maybe it's just that there are so many people who've moved here from all over the country, that it's not a big deal.
HOWEVER.
This fine eve, after work, I went into a specialty shop, a boutique-y lingerie store to be more specific. I was tired, just wanted to look around and see if I could find anything to spend my little gift certificate on (undapants). I don't like to be bothered or catered to when I'm deciding if I should spend money or not (you can probably guess it was not cheap by the words "boutique", "specialty", and "lingerie"). But I was the only person in the store and the clerk felt she had to earn her keep I suppose. So she proceeded to be all peaches and cream and try and help me find some things. I ended up with what I came in for (undapants) and the clerk proceeded to take my email and name as she was ringing me up. Well, I have a quiet voice. I don't project (unless I'm drunk), and I like it that way. I don't like loud and obnoxious and don't want to be accused of it. So, it took her a couple tries to get my email right and she mentioned that I had a quiet voice, TWICE.
YES THANK YOU I KNOW. GIVE ME UNDERPANTS.
Paid with debit card. She asked for I.D. and when she saw the Kansas license, smiled that Southern Gracious Asshole smile and said "Kansas. That explains it."
Then I set the place on fire, grabbed some $200 brassieres and walked out.
Or rather, laughed and then realized as I was leaving that she was being a bee hatch and went home to bitch about it ON MY BLOG. Because I'm awesome.
So, here you go, clerk at XXXXX XX XXXXXX:
- Let's not assume all Kansans are quiet little hayseeds just because we're not snotty, boisterous jackholes AND
- Let's not assume that just because my D.L. is from Kansas, that I haven't lived elsewhere.
The 'tude reminded me of this....with bonus art commentary:
Comments
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smerdyakov (anonymous) says...
Ah nice clip— but that the dreamy doe eyed girl from Solaris, she's virtually obliged to cop a tude. My guess is it was the same in your case...nothin personal.
May 30, 2009 at 9:42 a.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
gavon (Gavon Laessig) says...
This clerk has obviously never spent any time with me at the Pig, wilting Kansas sunflower that I am.
And by the way, since when does Kansas have a reputation for quiet and reserved? Two of our most famous icons are Fred Phelps and John Brown.
May 30, 2009 at 4:11 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
godjilla (Jill Ensley) says...
Speaking of The Pig and wilting flowers, I'll be in town soon. L.comrades drinking @ Piggins some night?
May 30, 2009 at 6:28 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
DOTDOT (anonymous) says...
Southern Dictionary sampler:
Thank Yew. = Fuck you.
Thank yew verry much. = Go fuck yourself.
Bless your heart. = Eat me, you dumb shit.
That explains it. = Ma brain! It's full of pigeon holes and I jes figgered whicha one ta put you in.
May 31, 2009 at 1:10 a.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
gavon (Gavon Laessig) says...
Jill, you name the night and we'll help you grease the Pig.
June 2, 2009 at 10:40 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )