Posted
by Liz Weslander
October 14, 2004 at 10:56 a.m.
Halloween musings
It would be easy to just say that I don't like Halloween. However, it would be more accurate to say that my attitude toward Halloween is a lot like my attitude toward skiing. I love the atmosphere, but not the event. Take skiing: Bulky sweaters, hot chocolate, cute boys on snowboards... fun. Looking like an ass while getting off the lift and risking injury on the way back down...not so fun. Take Halloween: Cool, autumn weather, pumpkins, excited children...fun. Cobbling together a costume your child may reject at the eleventh hour and dealing with sugar crashes... not so fun.Kids or not, I think that anyone who experiences any sort of Halloween-related stress would agree that the costumes are at the root of the problem. I know there are lots of you out there who truly enjoy making fantastic costumes for your children and yourself. However, for those of us who subscribe to the dig through the closets and throw it together at the last minute plan, Halloween can be a bit of a crap shoot. I know this because, as a child, my family relied heavily on the dig through the closets method. My mother shops frequently at garage sales and auctions, so our closets always had a decent selection of vintage clothes. Unfortunately, "vintage" translates to "lame" when you're in elementary school. For instance, nobody was really impressed the year I went as "old-fashioned girl" (vintage cotton lace dress and a fancy old hat) Nor were they impressed when my friend and I donned jackets, hats and sunglasses and went as the Blues Brothers. It may have been a good movie, but let's face it, the Blues Brothers were no ET or Yoda.Now that I have children, I'm starting to better understand my mother's low-maintenance approach to costumes. My children are extremely fickle about what goes on their bodies, and I am neither patient nor crafty. If I were to put in any time in front of a sewing machine or glue gun, only to have my kids reject the costume, things would get ugly. Still, I'm not ready to condemn my children to a childhood of lame, last-minute costumes. So for now, we either buy costumes, or borrow used ones from children with patient and crafty mothers. Of course, this is still not a full-proof plan. Just this morning, one of my daughters decided her second-hand pegasus costume was too tight and the other said her store-bought teddy bear costume was not the right color. However, because none of my sweat has gone into the costumes, I feel no irritation, just mild empathy.In the end, Halloween is all about the candy for the kids. Old-fashioned girl got as much as Yoda, and ill-fitting pegasus and wrong-color teddy bear will get just as much as this year's hand-crafted movie characters. Maybe next year I'll get out the glue gun and the sewing machine, but the pragmatic approach is working for me this year. For now, I think I'll push all thoughts of costumes and sugar crashes to the back of my mind, and go out and soak up some the cool, autumn atmosphere.
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n8 (anonymous) says…
My parents subscribed to the closet method as well, i could always fall back on bank robber(black sweatshirt and stockingcap with dollar sign pillowcase) or punk rocker with my sisters bright colored writbands and some hair spray).
MAMAT (anonymous) says…
I loved Halloween a whole lot more as a mom then as a kid. My folks not only didn't believe in helping with costumes, they rationed the candy we brought home - so we didn't pig out on it too fast. (Still, my sister managed to self-ration to the point she had hers - for bartering - long after the rest of our brood had eaten their one piece per day portions). I always WANTED a cool store bought costume, but my mom wasn't about to shell out money for something so fleeting as a once per year candy orge. If we didn't have the sense to make/dress ourselves up, she didn't worry about how it might scar us to be "different" from the other conformist ghouls around us. When I finally had my own kiddo to dress up it was lots of fun - even though I too couldn't afford to simply go to Walmart for some nice flimsy but trendy mask and night gown cum costume. But years of theater stood me in good stead. One of our first Halloween's in Lawrence was memorable. My son was 7 or 8. He wanted to be a robot for Halloween. So I wrapped his entire (coat clad) body in tin foil, top to bottom, and then painted his face with my many shade of metalic eye shadow. Then we took him out to go door-to-door begging. Never mind that there was a severe thunder storm moving into the area, and he was now a walking weather vane.... I was too busy dressing him up to notice that small detail. He still tells that story on his mom. But I don't think he has bad memories of his Halloween costumes. We made "wookies" by having him lay down on old furry rugs, and cutting out two sides to be sewn together (I am not a great seamstress) by literally stiching him inside the two furry rugs... (Going to the bathroom was interesting....). We put some awesome science fiction looking creatures together with household utensils. And we had fun together. Making costumes that were different, but cheap/free. Then if he changed his mind, HE got to help figure out something different! He learned that being "IN" wasn't nearly as much fun as making something really cool out of almost nothing. He's still pretty good not needing to follow a herd to enjoy himself. Kids and moms would enjoy a lot of things more if they weren't so concerned about being "normal". After all, isn't being different exactly what this particular holiday celebrates?
liz (Liz Weslander) says…
MAMAT, I hear what you're saying...and I'm not really worried about Halloween scarring my kids or whether or not we are normal, whatever the hell that is. What you describe with your son is sort of my "Norman Rockwell" vision of Halloween and I was just kind of making fun of myself because it's not the way my household looks at Halloween. But with kids who are only three, our Halloween routine is still a work in progress.
On the candy rationing thing, a friend of mind said that her dentist suggested letting the kids eat their candy freely for a few days then taking away whatever they don't finish. Apparently a bunch at once is easier on the teeth than a little each day over time. I think we may try this approach this year, mostly because I don't want my kids begging me for a piece of candy every day for the next month.
MAMAT (anonymous) says…
I love that approach with the candy. I think it would have worked better in my family! But my folks were all about the rules (God love them)! Hope it works out for you. And if not, oh well. It's not like any kid gets a perfect life or parent! Mom's who CARE- but aren't perfect - are much better, in my opinion, then the those moms who can't be bothered or who are trying to be too perfect. The 3 year olds will all too soon become 23 year olds. Mark my word! So - do what you think best, enjoy as much of the process as is humanly possible, and teach your kids to have survivial instincts!!! That will last them longer then happy Halloween memories (or teeth for that matter! LOL).
leslie (Leslie vonHolten) says…
I've come to admit that I've overdone it again this year with this Halloween business. I'm up to my elbows in bridal satin and "nickel" lamee, trying to whip up a medieval princess and dragonslayer. I know I should adopt the dig-through-the-closet method, yet there is something about my sicko Type A personality that won't allow this. I'll be up until 3 a.m. October 30, and again this year, despite my years-long dream of dressing up myself as Lady Macbeth, I will be dressed as "Tired Mom." It's an illness. I need an intervention!