Posted
by Marcy McGuffie
January 11, 2006 at 10:01 p.m.
Beastly Night Noise
Okay. I'm confessing an embarrassing, problematic issue plaguing many adults. I snore. No, no, no-not a cute, dainty, feminine snore. I snore like a dude. sighMy fiance revels in poking fun at this snore:er, I mean SORE spot. Now, everyone knows my dirty little secret. Occasionally, my terrible snort arouses me from slumber (yeah, I can't believe I am admitting this). Usually, sleeping on my stomach alleviates this annoyance. Though, I do realize consulting medical expertise would probably be warranted.So, what prompted me to own up to this plaguing issue? Somebody cough cfdxprt cough forwarded the following advertisement to my email. He typed in, "I thought you might be interested in this."The subject line: "Is your husband or wife causing you to lose sleep because of snoring?"![][1]Ouch! My natural ladylike response was to hunt the internet for an image of someone flipping the bird. Wait! Better yet, thanks to my lovely fiance, I am now the proud owner of a digital camera. Little did he know upon gifting, that I would turn the camera into a war weapon. Within minutes, my man received a pleasant picture of me flipping him off. Gosh, I make my mom proud.The following picture is an edited version of what cfdxprt received. Frankly, I had to remove my face for public viewing because I look atrocious due to the fact I've been sicker than shit this week with a "fever of unknown origins" Ick! Has anyone ever been violated with a nasal swab to be tested for the flu? Awkward:![][2]Anyway, my fiance innocently replied to my email.cfdxprt: Why are you flicking me off, I was just trying to be helpful?My reply: Likely story!I could've ragged on him for saying "flicking off" in lieu of "flipping off." I laugh my ass off every time I hear him say that expression. Maybe it's a regional thing. In my parts of the woods:we've always referred to it as FLIPPING. A quick google search confirms my wording is the more popular expression. "Flipping off" returns 76,900 results while "flicking off" returns a mere 23,200. Yes, I am the google queen. Quick poll: do you ever google people (friends, family, potential dates)?Anyway:back to my illness. High fever. Chills. Sweats. Pounding headache. Dizziness. Excessive thirst. This junk has been riding my ass since Sunday. I may be mending:or it could be the ibuprofen talking. It remains to be determined... [1]: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v345/beatle919/snore.jpg [2]: http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v345/beatle919/flipoff.jpg
Comments
Lawrence.com does not necessarily agree with comments posted below - responsibility lies with the relevant user alone. Read our full policy.
Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
Cdfxprt- earplugs. They'll be your friend in the years to come- trust me.
chewyfally (Falestine Afani Ruzik) says…
Just wait until you FART so loud in your sleep that it wakes both of you up. :-D
cvillehawk (anonymous) says…
I always said "flicking off" when I was a kid, but when I got older "flipping off" sounded much more adult to me, so I adopted that instead.
mitzibel (Misty Nuckolls) says…
Nice sparkly, btw.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Dazie: For the record, I should probably invest in earplugs too. He'll deny it...but, I've heard a snore or two escape his throat passages...
Chewfally: Aaaaah!!! What are you talking about? I don't fart... ;)
Cvillehawk: Come to think of it, I can remember friends using that expression when I was a kid. Thus confirming my suspicions that cfdxprt is a kid--at heart.
Misty: Gracias...this pic doesn't do it justice.
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
I'm just glad that I can poke you in the middle of the night and say you're snoring and it stops you long enough for me to go back to sleep. At least most of the time...I know I snore too sometimes, and shameful confession, I am the fart king. OK, so I'm really not too ashamed of that confession.
As far as dialects, I DID spend my formative years in semi-rural GA, so there's going to be more weird word choices to come. At least I don't get you up in the morning and tell you to go fix me some grits - woman ;)
ladylaw (Terry Bush) says…
Nice ring. And do consult a medical expert. It's not just annoying to snore so badly you wake people up, or lose sleep, it can be a sign or cause of something worse - like heart issues. And they now have several ways of "curing" the problem. So, while you are still young and not TOO sleep deprived (talk to Misty about what a baby does to sleep patterns) get a sleep monitor from your. Dr. and get it checked out. They'll send you home with some machine you hook up to yourself for a night, then analyze what it says about how well you slept etc. Oh, and if you have had a fever for 5 days, it's also time to check with the experts on THAT little problem also!
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
ladylaw - As always, you offer wise advice. I've thought about seeking medical advice...but I'm kinda weird about seeing doctors. I have to work up the nerve to talk to 'em. And as far as the fever, I went to KU's student health center yesterday. If I'm not any better by tomorrow, I'm supposed to go back. But - good news...I woke up this morning, fever free.
cfdxprt - I can't believe you outted yourself as an occasional snorer...and its in print. I was trying to be gracious by not outting you as the fart king. But, now that you've said it - yes, I have been awoken by your explosions from down under. You know better than to demand I make grits...cuz, you'd probably find a special surprise in 'em if you ever demanded I cook something...
thetom (anonymous) says…
Flicking off is something you do with a booger. Where I come from in semi-rural southern GA (some people call it Jacksonville, FL), you get your ass kicked for an on-target violation.
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
beatle - that was mainly a joke about the rednecks I grew up around, on more than one occasion during sleep-overs I heard that phrase uttered in the morning. I realize I'll have to do most of the cooking, I mean you don't even put tuna in your mac and cheese and you like meat well done.
thetom - point taken, I'll try to work on my phraseology.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
thetom: ohmygosh...you're right, that phrase makes so much more sense for what some do with fresh nose pickin's
cfd: I figured it was joke...but, the smartass in me had to make a comment. And don't knock on my cooking. Tuna is NASTY...and I'm a mac and cheese purist. And excuse me for not wanting my meat mooing at me...
Todd (anonymous) says…
Yeah, tell us more about the ring. Is that a 4-prong or Tiffany (6-prong) mount? Looks like a round cut set on platinum, silver, or white gold. Are you getting a fancy band with stones or just regular band?
My wife keeps hinting that I can always upgrade her ring/band. I got her a setup much like yours. Now she says it fine with her if I got a 3 diamond setup and used the existing stone as one of the side stones.
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
I'll steal Marcy's thunder, since she'd have to whip out the insurance documents anyway, being as though she knew nothing of diamonds before we went shopping.
It's a 4 prong princess cut in white gold. 0.62 cw, VS2, I believe F color. Marcy didn't want to wait for me to shop ebay for a Tiffany Lucida, which is the ring I've always wanted to give to that special someone.
I'll let her describe what the band is going to be like, since she's working with Goldmakers to hammer out the details...
Now for some feedback from the group. A pretty simple men's band in tungsten carbide steel runs about $1200. I say that I can buy a lathe, machine it and get the heat treatment done for less than that. Plus then I'd have a lathe. She'd prefer to just buy a band. Is it just 'man think' to prefer to have a lathe and a band?
Todd (anonymous) says…
cfdxprt... what kind of a man are you? Get a cheapo gold/silver band for like <$500 and be done with it. No one gives a rats behind what's on a guy's hand.
I got my wife a .72 carat, VVS2, E color, round cut diamond off the NY diamond exchange. It was sweet, you can buy a stone just like you'd buy a stock. (pay comission) Then had it slapped into a platinum 4 prong ring. Myself, I'm sportin' a $200 12 or 14 carat gold band that no one ever commented on in the last 7 years I've had it.
So you can understand now why I don't want to go out an buy another equivalent stone and a bigger equivalent stone then slap them in a 3-stone ring. If you cut me blood comes out not money :)
As long as I'm in the advice giving mood... I don't know if this will go over for you but I alway thought it would be cool to do a surprise honeymoon. You know, the man goes and buys the tickets and makes all the arrangements and the bride doesn't find out until they are at the airport. After planning a wedding the last thing a bride needs to worry about is the honeymoon. And do go right after the wedding. It makes the whole experience of getting married nicer and longer. (reality sux)
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Todd: I don't care what kind of ring cfdxprt has...but, I do not want him making a homemade one. An artist he ain't. Ok, cfd is somewhat of a metals expert...hence, his giving a crap what it's made out of. I like your surprise honeymoon idea, but its out! We're doing a destination wedding: Vancouver Island, British Columbia. He has to present a paper at a conference in Vancouver...so, we'll get the engineer stuff out of the way, head to the island, get hitched and honeymoon.
I'll post some pics of my ring and the band I'm interested in. Its a 5 stone shared prong ring (round stones).
cfd: correction: .64 carats and its a different letter...can't remember what
thetom (anonymous) says…
lathe! lathe! lathe! lathe!
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Oh yeah...then, we're having a dance/reception at Liberty Hall w/Vermont St BBQ catering and The Dewayn Bros performing!
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
Todd - I'll probably go the cheap ring route, the only reason I'm even pondering the tungsten carbide is because I'm an engineer and would find it cool in the most geeky of ways (my ring has a minimum yield strength of 120 ksi; watch, I can stand on it in the weak direction and it does nothing). Of course only my engineer friends would find that cool...
On the wedding/honeymoon, Marcy has always wanted to elope and it so happens that I have to present 2 papers at the ASME conference in Vancouver, BC later on this year, so my travel is paid for. After the conference we're going to Vancouver Island to get hitched and honeymoon around for a while (my boss's wife said that just going to the conference as a honeymoon sucks - from personal experience).
We're splitting duties on planning the reception about 50/50. Marcy did the legwork on finding the location - Liberty Hall. I did the legwork on finding the band - The Dewayn Bros. Marcy and her mom have been doing the legwork on decorations, since I wouldn't do a good job on that. I chose the catering option. Marcy is working on designing the wedding band, I just have to approve the 4C's on the diamonds going in. Of course once we decided to get married we figured out there was a lot of details to be hammered out, so that's just a partial list.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
My ring (quite blurry)
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v34...
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v34...
What I *think* I want my band to look like
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v34...
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
thetom: are you voting for the lathe? don't encourage him!!! I think his ring would look homemade *shudder*
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
thetom - Thanks for the support!
Marcy - Actually, I was looking on ebay earlier today (waiting on my computer to finish doing something I told it to start 6 hours ago) and I can get a CNC (computer numerically controlled) lathe the size I'd need for the ring and rocket parts for about $700. Then we could take my calipers to the jewlers, pick out a ring we agree on, I could take some measurements, draw it up and precision machine it. It would look alright, I promise. I may not be artistic, but I do have experience machining things...AND while you're at home, unemployed, would it kill you to read the manual for the camera and figure out how to actually use it? Those pictures shouldn't be blurry.
thetom (anonymous) says…
Yes, and all 4 of my votes count because I used caps.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
I don't "do" manuals. Alright? Sheesh...
And be a normal person...take Todd's advice. El-Cheapo Ring. Seriously, the paper clip wedding band is looking better and better...I can certainly afford one of those...
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
thetom: Men... *rolls eyes*
thetom (anonymous) says…
And exclamation points!
And you go roll your eyes, because I know you're not even thinking about rocket parts.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Tungsten carbide... wasn't that the world orbited by the luxury ship in "The Fifth Element?"
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Nevermind. I think it was actually Flosten Paradise. But you see how I could be confused...
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
thetom: you're no longer on my *good* side. never mind, I never had a good side...but, I give you points for feist
but, what is up with the rocket parts? i'm not at all mechanically inclined...
Joel: easy mistake. if its any consolation, i too, am easily confused
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
i meant feistiness...
Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
I agree- nobody cares what the man's band looks like. *lol* My husband had a $100 band from Sears that got stolen, a family heirloom band (my ggrandmother- she was a big woman!) that was lost and at that point I told him no more wedding bands for him. We were on vacation and he found a $5 silver celtic braid band, bought it and has worn it for years. :) So many people have said "Oh what a beautiful band!" when they see it. Cracks me up.
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
Marcy - Unlike the kit rocket that we built your nephews, I design and build my own. This typically involves the construction of parts that are non-standard and metal to handle the stresses. I won't disclose my machine shop bill for the last rocket, but it wasn't pretty - especially since I buried that one in the ground. So, really the lathe would help us save money ;)
Joel - Tungsten Carbide is commonly known as tool steel. I think it would be difficult to convince most fiances to buy a tool steel ring, so the jewlers refer to it by its technical name so it sounds fancy.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Hmm...Dazie's onto something.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
cfd...so you're saying you're too good for the hobby lobby rockets?
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
I'm not too good for the hobby lobby rockets, they were my bread and butter when I was growing up. I just prefer rockets that require flight waivers before flying them, they're slightly more exciting and dangerous. This year I'll have to settle for the HL rockets though, since my rocket budget is going to be used for other purposes...
I was going to comment that Dazie was onto something - what's it matter if my ring looks homemade?
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Yo, I don't want my man sporting a ring that looks unprofessional. And, I thought you told me it wouldn't look homemade...
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
Well I just figured that if it didn't matter what the ring looked like I could machine it by hand. I'm not bad with a lathe, but probably couldn't get the best surface finish without a couple of attempts.
thetom (anonymous) says…
Well, cfd, if you don't have a lathe now, being single and all, and you can't trick her into it within the wedding rationalization opportunities, you may as well forget about it until the kids graduate from college. Do the math, but don't worry, you're young.
lathe. lathe. lathe. lathe.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Don't make me out to be the bad gal! He can buy a lathe...he just ain't makin' his own ring!
thetom (anonymous) says…
Cool!
Everybody's happy cause cfd can make ME a ring then!
I want Carbide.
Todd (anonymous) says…
So much fuss over a man-ring ;)
So cfdxprt, you are a mechanical engineer working for the feds? How'd you manage to be in Lawrence anyhow? I'm a software engineer and can't find anything in town that pays decent. (compared to JoCo) I would really like to live and work in Lawrence. Everytime I think I'm fed up with the commute enough I start thinking of the 20%+ pay cut. *shudders*
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
thetom - now it's a business opportunity, if I can sell pennies worth of steel for way less than a jewler, I still make out good...
Todd - I don't work for the feds, I work for a small consulting firm; although we do do business with the feds occasionally. I took a paycut to come to Lawrence, though not because I knew how much Larry-ville kicked ass at the time, as that was where the business was relocated to (we were purchased, and my boss didn't want to commute to JoCo everyday). I've put 5 years into trying to make this company a standout and a 14% paycut wasn't going to disuade me. Hell, even in JoCo I was working for about half my market rate, but I'm not moving to or working in Detroit or for a large corporation.
The job market in Lawrence isn't that great, as Marcy will attest to. I always recommend the American dream, which is to go into business for yourself. It's not easy and there's a lot of steps that are involved before you take the leap, and it can be scary as shit sometimes, but it can be the most rewarding thing you ever do. I haven't made it there yet, I still have a boss, but my input is as important as his (moreso on things I'm more technically competent in), I'm a part owner in the company and the layers of bureaucracy that I have to deal with are nil. I'll take that over making 6 figures any day.
ladylaw (Terry Bush) says…
Man's ring issue - Penny's has good prices and choices (and no I have no stock in them nor have I ever worked there)....I just pay attention to prices on such things. We got my husband's there. A lovely BLACK hematite looking metal (so it won't scratch, break, melt, or otherwise ever have to be replaced). In Titanium. Very unusual and very nice looking. $95 on-line at http://www.e-weddingbands.com/store/T...
Meanwhile, Marcy, go get that sleep apnea thing checked out - now. The more damage you do to your heart.....the worse. So why risk it? If you don't have a problem, then you don't and that's great. IF you do, then getting it addressed early can avoid a ton of heart ache down the road.
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Ladylaw: don't worry...i've been adequately convinced!
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
And thanks for the link!
Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
Joel- I just noticed you mad a "Fifth Element" reference. That makes me *heart* you more than ever.