March 3, 2006
Q: I have a quick question - can one swallow too much semen? My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half and I have always swallowed his semen when performing oral sex. This happens about three or four times a week. How well does semen digest? I know it is pretty much full of protein, right? Can you tell me the pros and cons, please? I do appreciate any information you can give me.A: And it's low in calories! Seriously, you have nothing to worry about. Semen is harmless, unless of course, there is some form of STI present, but here again it is not the semen that is troublesome. As to pros and cons, it seems to me that swallowing your partner's semen is an entirely positive experience for both of you, so I can't really think of negatives. It should also be noted that if your boyfriend gives you oral sex (which only seems fair) he is likely ingesting your vaginal secretions, which are also harmless to him, given no STI or vaginal infection, etc. Lot's of folks struggle with sharing oral-genital sexual interactions. For example, the myth that it is somehow "dirty." Truth be known, the mouth is much "dirtier" than any normal, healthy genital. Kissing is "dirtier" than oral sex, given the bacterial content of saliva. Frankly, I think all of the destructive, harmful jokes about genital cleanliness, especially women's genitals, are part of a larger social conspiracy to keep women from being sexual and enjoying sexual interactions, especially as youth. Your attitude seems very healthy, and frankly refreshing, and you have obviously integrated oral sex into your sexual experience with each other, so enjoy!! Q: I'm curious whether you might comment on iconography for sex in dreams. I've been writing down my dreams for several years now and notice frequent sexual content but I am having difficulty discerning any patterns or attributing meaning. (Of course, there are those individuals who say that dreams simply are meaningless). I'm a healthy, middle-aged, heterosexual male, and while the vast majority of my dreams involve very pleasant sex with women (some of whom I can identify, others are anonymous), I've had some dreams in which I am female, engaging in rather enjoyable lovemaking. In my waking life, I like my gender identity and I've never had sex with a man before. Do other people dream of sex frequently? What sorts of dreams are common? Your thoughts?A: First thing I had to do was look up "iconography." Just kidding. True, sexual dreams are very common and run a wide range of every conceivable sexual variation known to humankind. This would include being in the opposite gender and being involved in sexual interactions that are opposite our dominant sexual orientation and sexual behaviors that we have little preference for in our real life experience. And it is not at all surprising that you see no pattern, as I suspect there is none. My own theoretical perspective results in the view that, generally, "dreams are just dreams" and that they yield relatively few insights into the complexity of the dreamer's psychological status or life course. There are other perspectives that use dream products as a part of the therapeutic process. If you would like to analyze your dreams for this perspectives, four or five years of psychoanalysis, two or three times a week, at $125 to $150 an hour will get you what you might be looking for. My advice is to treat your disciplined notation of your dreams as a literary and artistic exercise, being cautious of what you make of your dreaming, because I think we can make anything we want our of our dream life. Just like lots of folks would not act upon many of their fantasies, they may have very positive erotic value (the nice thing about fantasy is you can do anything you want and not get arrested). Over analyzing one's own dreams - for example, involvement in opposite gender sexual interactions - may have no meaning regarding our sexual identity, yet prove to be very erotically pleasing. Just like some of our fantasies might frighten or confuse us, dreams can have the same consequence. So I think it's useful and important to remember that fantasies are just fantasies and dreams are just dreams.
Comments
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OnShakedown (Chris Tackett) says...
Good to see you post again. It's been too long! Hope everything is going well!
March 3, 2006 at 2:26 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
ladylaw (Terry Bush) says...
Reminds me of an old joke: What women are 11's? A 10 who swallows! LOL.
March 4, 2006 at 1:49 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
godjilla (Jill Ensley) says...
Love your posts, but this..."Truth be known, the mouth is much "dirtier" than any normal, healthy genital. Kissing is "dirtier" than oral sex, given the bacterial content of saliva."...is just what the blow-job happy eleven year-olds, or hell, 26 year-olds, need to hear.
March 4, 2006 at 9:45 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
trinity (anonymous) says...
just wanted to echo that it's great to see your column, dr. d!
thanks for all you do.
March 6, 2006 at 5:12 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
greyhawk (anonymous) says...
Kind of quiet on this blog....
Yes, thanks Dr. Dailey. Your informative comments are great.
Jill, your post could be interpreted a couple of ways. Are you pleased that accurate information about oral sex is being disseminated (sorry, couldn't resist the wordplay) to the 11-26 age demographic? Or are you suggesting that the comments may inappropriately encourage oral sex in that same demographic, rather than socially acceptable kissing?
As to the palatability of semen, various sources suggest flavor can be improved by avoiding alcohol. Anyone out there with practical experience that cares to comment?
March 8, 2006 at 9:11 a.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
nbnozzy (anonymous) says...
What a person eats helps to determine the taste of their secretions. Red meats, salt, and alcohol should be limited if you want your partner to better enjoy your taste. Also, smoking is a negative factor. Eating fruits and vegetables can improve the taste. There are pills on the market that are loaded with the extracts of kiwi and celery that are supposed to help.
March 12, 2006 at 9:43 a.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )
geomeo (anonymous) says...
You're right on the mark nbnozzy - my girlfriend insists that I eat plenty of fruits because she says that it definately makes my semen taste sweeter. And whatever the little lady wants, the little lady gets! I've tried different herbal pills too (semen volumizers) and they also seem to effect the taste of sperm.
January 6, 2007 at 11:14 p.m. ( permalink | suggest removal )