Now with 90 percent less Frenchgoatiness!

AND THE WINNER IS: Trillian.I'm not going to reprint Trillian's end of my story here, since Trillian added it to the posts of my last blog. Trillian gets a $5 gift certificate to La Prima Tazza. (Wee!) Just as soon as Trillian e-mails me where I can send the gift certificate.Gil might have won. Except Gil, I'm almost certain, is an associate of mine. The mouth-yeast-infection-Monostat plotline bears a striking resemblance to an incident I had in high school (looooong story, involving the mistake of dropping a football mouth guard on the practice field and popping it back into my mouth -- repeatedly -- without washing it off). Also, Gil made reference to my high school English teacher in his official entry. Some folks protested that I shouldn't exclude friends and colleagues, since I have a LOT of friends and colleagues. Fair enough. But since I had made those the rules this time, I thought I'd stick with them through the end.Final thought: Who the heck is Lula?NEVER MIND: Turns out Trilian is yet another associate of mine, who also was disguising herself.*I'm starting to get the feeling that only three or four people read this blog. That all of them are friends of mine. And that they're ALL trying to keep me from finding out.*Anyway, no one wins the gift certificate. Pooh on y'all anyway.Other, random Larry-Kingish thoughtsFine story about Lawrence's Bill James, the baseball statistician, in this week's New Yorker. That's right, New Yorker. We're hitting the big time, baby! ... I'm just not thrilled with movie offerings these days. Hulk? Blah. T-3? Blah. Anything with Kate Hudson in it? Blah, blah. Only two exceptions: Spellbound and 28 Days Later. I haven't actually seen them. But I really want to. ... Who else is tempted to show up at the Bourgeois Pig next week to see Reynaud on Bastille Day? ... Current album obsession: "Elephant" by the White Stripes. ... What's the next competition, folks? ... Go to Jamie Roper's "Wrong Side of the Wall" blog and beg him to keep writing. He's leaving China and is threatening an end to the blog. ... Now that is counting the number of blog responses, I'm tempted to devise a way of increasing the number of your postings without just posting repeatedly under my own name. Maybe that can be the competition: A posting response competition. Hmmm. Maybe not. ... Does anybody want to do the story-writing game again? Or maybe we should have a "Friends o' Cup O' Joel" party somewhere one of these evenings. Anybody who wanted to remain anonymous could wear a paper bag over their head. We should probably wait until Jemima returns from England. I am NOT fooled by the "lovely singing voice" comment.


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