Posted
by Joel Mathis
January 9, 2006 at 9:51 a.m.
I (heart) Neil Diamond
It was about 1981 when my parents bought a stereo - actually, a boombox - and about a half-dozen tapes that would serve as the family's complete music collection for the next few years.The selections included:¢ Barbra Streisand and Barry Gibb: "Guilty."¢ Eagles: "Their Greatest hits 1971-1975."¢ Billy Joel: "Glass Houses."¢ Christopher Cross' self-titled album, the one with "Sailing."¢ A tape of instrumental Christmas music.My family, suffice it say, did not rock very hard.Among that pile of cheese, though, one album planted the firmest roots in the synapses of my mind: Neil Diamond's soundtrack for his 1980 remake of "The Jazz Singer."I once went more than 10 years without hearing any part of the album, but it was played so often during my formative years that I could still recall details vividly: The lyrics to "Love on the Rocks," the "That's a white boy!" exclamation at the end of another song, the much-forgotten tune praising a riverboat named "The Robert E. Lee," which - given the racial legacy of the first "Jazz Singer," seems a bit unfortunate.So when I spotted a used copy of the soundtrack at Love Garden last week, of course I had to buy it. Also, despite the friendliness and understanding of the staff there, I felt a desperate need to explain myself. Luckily, there was understanding all around.I took the CD straight home and put it on my stereo. It was everything I remembered: a little bit epic, a little more cheesy and a lot more, well, Neil Diamond. I sang along, in my best Neil imitation, the songs that have been sitting in my head for 25 years.And then I realized: I have no way of judging whether "The Jazz Singer" is any good or not. My parents played it so often during the period before I developed a musical taste of my own that I just can't be objective about it. The things that fill your childhood - like Kraft Macaroni and Cheese, for example - become comfortable to you, and remain that way even if your adult tastes evolve, even if you mature to a point where you know that the things you loved as a child were, in fact, bad.It could be, then, that my new/old Neil Diamond album is awful, but I don't care. So, parents, this is my plea to you: Play good music for your children. They'll thank you. And for pete's sake, never, ever let them listen to Christopher Cross.
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Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
Joel- I may have to smack you. I listened to the Jazz Singer soundtrack as well growing up, and now have that song in my head. Nothing you can do or say... you've got to leave... just get away...
Stab me now. :)
BUT- it was better than one of my dad's other recordings- a car race. who listens to a record of a car race???
cvillehawk (anonymous) says…
A friend of mine said one of his ex-girlfriends loved the soundtrack to "Jurassic Park" - the actual score with dinosaur roars thrown in. He said it was all he could do not to crack up (funny what love will make you do).
edie_ (anonymous) says…
TODAY! I'm glad you support the Love Garden but are you not aware that there are 25 cent copies of The Jazz Singer in nearly every North American thrift store? Even if you're at a high falutin' thrift that charges a shameful DOLLAR per record, the clerk is usually embarassed enough for you to go half price for "The Jazz Singer."
Neil Diamond is a perennial joy rider on the turntable at our house. I love him...and NOT in a hipster ironic way. He is the king, the Jewish Elvis, and anyone who makes fun of him for wearing a girdle is crusin' for a brusin' hand crafted especially by me.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Edie: Re "Jewish Elvis." My favorite thing about the CD is a photo of Neil, with a Grizzly Adams beard and a cowboy hat. It's a whole different side of the sequin-lovin' Neil Diamond I thought I knew so well.
edie_ (anonymous) says…
See what a virtuoso Neil is? Sequins, cowboy boots, Jess Robinovich...he's got it all. You do realize he was the real magic behind the Monkees song "I'm a Believer."
I think the hitchhiking cowboy sequence in Jazz Singer was Neil's segueway to his hit single "Forever in Blue Jeans." Not only is that song the Jewish Elvis anthem for getting laid by a fireplace on a bear rug, it hosts one of my favorite lyrics: "Honey's sweet, but it ain't nothin' next to Baby's treat."
AND since you just revealed that you're into Streisand (which makes me wonder, is there something ELSE you have to tell us?) you should also enjoy the blue jeans album for Neil's memorable duet Barbra: "You Don't Bring Me Flowers Anymore." For even greater laughs, you should hear the version of that song that Rob and I do. If you need a copy of that album, I beg you to save yourself some money and get it at the League. I might have an extra copy myself for those "in need."
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Um: Not into Streisand. That's what my parents owned when I was a kid. I've got nothing to be guilty of...
cee (anonymous) says…
Joel, why oh why did you have to pull out the "Guilty" lyrics? I was doing fine until I read your last comment. Presto! my repressed memories of my parents' stereo quickly flare up and I've got an instant case of chronic earworm.
The infectious Barry Gibb will be haunting my brain for the next six hours or so. merde.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Cee: We've got nothing to be guilty of/ our love can climb any mountain....
Sorry. Now it's in MY head, too.
lazz (anonymous) says…
If you haven't heard much of ol' Neil since the salad days, Joel, you aren't spending enough time in barrooms ... The Bad Boy of of Whitebread Soul gets cranked up about 11 p.m. nightly on jukes from coast to coast ... it's an epidemic here, of course, but I can also report that an extremely hip bar in an extremely hip district of Seattle with extremely hip Seattle musicians present did a few arm-in-arm, top-of-the-lungs Neil singalongs when one of the bartenders provided the tunes for his own going-away bash ... so i figured at that point, there's no fightin' it, might as well join the fun ...
punkrockmom (Nikki May) says…
well, since I am not allowed to say how utterly disgusted I am, I do have to say, I'm glad it's you and not me. This did bring back the childhood, but my parents must have been more hip. although, we didn't have cassettes back then. We had a big console radio that had a record player and a 8 track player. It was great. We had that Eagles best of and we had glasshouses. To this day, Billy Joel has that special place (my husband thinks I'm insane).
Anyway, my mom's second husband was obsessed with the Beatles, and even though I was in 1st grade, I remember exactly when I found out that John was dead.
My mom was obsessed with Van Halen (she saw them every year from the early days).
As for boom boxes, I bought my first one (with paperroute money) when I was in 5th or 6th grade (85 or 86) and I was so cool because I had dual cassette. Oh, I'm on a tangent! stop me now
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
I feel so left out, my parents never did listen to Neil.
I do however have the capability to sing along with pretty much every John Denver song ever. Most Waylon and Willie too...
Along punkrockmom's timeframe, my most vivid memory is going to the record store with my gramps to pick out the Dire Straits tape with "Money for Nothing" on it so he could listen to it in his car. In return I got the 45 of la-di-da-di by Slick Rick. That wasn't really a record meant for a second grader when I listen to it now.
Oh well, Marcy will state that I'm warped - that's probably the start of it.
leslie (Leslie vonHolten) says…
...and when we rock-a the mic, we rock the mic RIGHT
I need to thank my parents for their decent taste in music (it has aged well). However, I must shamefully admit that my more embarrassing preferences (George Michael!!!) are all my own.
cfdxprt (anonymous) says…
and on and on keeping ya'll in heck (it is Joel's blog...) just to see you smile and enjoy yourself...
'cause it's cool in this calm and cozy position, that we create 'cause that's our mission.
I didn't discover my dad's Jimi albums until I was 14. That was probably the first rock I ever listened to. It was mom's country and for some reason I caught rap at its outbreak - I can sing along with Whodini, the whole first Run-DMC album, Fat Boys, et al.
Not bragging, just childhood memories dug back up...as embarrasing as it is, Marcy can also attest to my ability to sing along with Madonna. At least old school Madonna...
ssmarsh (Sarah Smarsh) says…
Felt obligated to share this with the masses.
http://www.pitch.com/issues/2003-06-0...
beatle919 (Marcy McGuffie) says…
Oh gawsh...I do love me some Neil Diamond! I rawck out to Sweet Caroline every time...
I've always been a nerd when it comes to musical selection. When I was 16, I went to Vegas with my Mom, Aunt, and cousin. Guess who had to beg the old ladies to see Wayne Newton? Yep, I had to drag 'em to see Waynie (but, they thanked me afterwards).
Anyway, cfdxprt--warped is an understatement. ;) Yeah, you sing some mean Madonna...
Leslie--ain't nothing wrong with some George Michael!
SAHM2tylrnathan (anonymous) says…
One of my favorite guilty pleasures! I still have my unused Neil Diamond tickets from December 1985, my first semester at KU. My roommate and our moms and I were supposed to go to Kemper to see Neil and that afternoon we were hit by a winter storm that dropped more than a couple of inches of ice pellets from Topeka to KC and stopped the party. :0( Eventually I did make the pilgrimage with my whole family to the "In the Round" concert.
Although he tends to get pretty monotone, I still love the guy! Actually saw a new song "Delirious Love" on Leno last month with Brian Wilson of all people. There are some rave reviews for the new album "12 Songs."
Gotta love the chutzpah of a Jew who does a Christmas album too.
You got the way to move me, Cherry!
thetom (anonymous) says…
Cherry Baby!
AAWww but I love the way that you do me ...
OOPS
Sorry gotta go....
dflygrl (anonymous) says…
Aaaaugh!!!!! Neil is my homey!!!!! AAAAA!!!!!! Bklyn, yo!!! and i didn't get to go see him at kemper either! man . . .
punkrockmom (Nikki May) says…
Dire Straits was one of my dad's bands. We went and saw a laser light show of them.
irnmadn88 (anonymous) says…
If one were really cool, they would still have their parents stereo from 1980...furniture sized speakers, tube amp, and sounds better than any digital surround sound unit out there...
lori (anonymous) says…
My parents were not Neil Diamond fans. My parents had I think 6 albums my entire childhood. Kenny Rogers, Three Dog Night, Two Beach Boys albums, Simon and Garfunkel, and that Bonnie woman, I can't remember her last name, but that song "I need a hero, I'm holding on for a hero til the end of the night," I unfortunately remember well. We did listen to alot of radio out there in central Kansas. I can belt me out some Abba, as well as lots of other late 70s-early 80s western Kansas standards.
Oh, we did have a christmas album, some orchestra, the Manfred, Mansfield, something like that. Not good stuff.
I wonder what my kids will complain about. Is there anyone who says "Man, my parents had the best music when I was growning up!"?
lostblend (Keith Campbell) says…
My Mom took me with her to see Neil Diamond. Now when ever someone asks me what my first concert was, I have to tell them Neil Diamond, and then I have to explain I was about 8 and had no choice. I reluctantly admit that "Forever in Blue Jeans" is a catchy tune.
leslie (Leslie vonHolten) says…
Lori: That would be me. My parents listened to Hank Williams Sr., Bill Monroe, Elvis, Willie Nelson, Charlie McCoy, Ennio Morricone soundtracks, the Happy Goodmans, the Whites, Lightnin' Hopkins...
When I started buying my own music: Rick Springfield, Duran Duran, Wham! UK, David Bowie's Let's Dance stuff. Awful. This was a disaster to my father. Fortunately we found common ground in the Great Equalizer: Tom Petty.
lilchick (anonymous) says…
I still enjoy...okay love, the music my parents had when I was growing up...The Eagles, The Boss, Arlo Guthrie....I still think the motorcycle song is waaay underrated!, Van Halen, Led Zeplen, the Who, Rolling Stones, Willie, Waylon, Hank Sr. and Jr., Lynard Skynard, wow the list just goes on. I am now in a custody battle with my dad over his currently unused records. Seeing how I got my soon to be hubby a record player for christmas, I think that we should be allowed to enjoy them!
Feents (Caterina Benalcazar) says…
Joel, you complete philistine! If I ever hear you slag on Christopher Cross again, the mighty fist of the Yacht Rock collective will flatten you with the smoothness of a Catalina sunset!
http://channel101.com/shows/show.php?...
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Feents: I've got such a long way to go (such a long way to go) to make it to the border of Mexico. So I'll ride like the wind, ride like the wind.
Dah dah dah dah, duh duh duh duh, dah dah dah dah, dah dah DAH dah.
Dah dah dah, duh duh duh duh - dah! dah! dah! dah!
Ride!
Dah dah dah dah, duh duh duh duh, dah dah dah dah, dah dah DAH dah.
Dah dah dah, duh duh duh duh - dah! dah! dah! dah!
(Slow fade out.)
lazz (anonymous) says…
"Dire Straits was one of my dad's bands" .... oh god I've never felt so old ...
jayhawkanne (Anne Bracker) says…
My dad always had 61 Country on the AM Radio when I was growing up. Mom preferred Elvis, although she still hasn't recovered from her teen years when she had to sell all her original Elvis albums (probably worth a fortune now) to pay for parts to a drag car she wanted to build. Mostly, though, my early years were spent with the dulcet tones of people like Kenny Rogers, Ronnie Milsap, Glen Campbell (oh, I used to LOVE me some Rhinestone Cowboy!), and Anne Murray.
I also remember flipping through albums from their pre-children days, seeing several Herb Alpert & His Tijuana Brass Band, memorable not only because of the weird-ass name, but also a fairly risque (at the time) album cover of a naked girl with her girlie parts covered with whipped cream and two conveniently placed cherries.
But my biggest early-childhood music memory is the 8-track player Dad found at a garage sale and gave to me. One of the cassettes included a catchy little tune called, "Mrs. Robinson" by Simon & Garfunkel. It took me years to realize why the adults would give me strange looks and chuckle when I would sing along with that song at 8 years old.
lizziemarie (anonymous) says…
Okay, my Mother actually took me and a friend in a Chicago snowstorm to see Shawn Cassidy! Way up in the extra nosebleed seats with our homeade I heart Shawn t-shirts. She was an angel. There, now it's out in the open. We did have the 8-track with Billy Don't be a Hero, Suspicious minds with Jesse Coulter and Waylon Jennings and of course You're Havin' my Baby and the ever popular The Devil Went Down to Georgia.
punkrockmom (Nikki May) says…
"Dire Straits was one of my dad's bands" .... oh god I've never felt so old ...
No, he was young. He adopted us when he married my mom. If he was alive now, he'd only be 46. (WOW, that's wild to think about, I'd not thought of his age until now, I'm nearly the age he was when he died). Anyway, I digress, my dad was young, and got into then new music.
katnip (Deb Townsend) says…
My parents' crimes consist of Loggins and Messina, ("Even though we aint got money, I'm so in love with you honey"), Barbara Streisand's "The Broadway Album," Willie Nelson's "Stardust," Culture Club (mom had a Karma Chameleon issue, that is until she saw the video, we didnt hear much from 'ole George after that), The Doobie Brothers album with "Black Water," and the Roberta Flack tape my dad was nuts over. I am so lucky not to be on strong meds at this point.
CafeSiren (anonymous) says…
I have no idea if my parents ever listened to music in front of me. I may have had no musical influences growing up at all. I do remember that I always seemed about 6 months behind my friends in figuring out what new band was cool. Still am, I think. But now that I'm Old, no one expects me to be hip anymore. It's a relief.
The first music I ever bought on my own? Duran Duran.
My musical guilty pleasure? Fleetwood Mac.
lori (anonymous) says…
Oh, Lizziemarie, I remember in 2nd grade a girl named TIffany had a pillow with Shawn Cassidy on it; we were all so jealous.
Lori
lazz (anonymous) says…
Wow, Fleetwood Mac fans now have to admit to their interest as a "guilty pleasure," eh?
Sheesh that band was huge. And, I thought, damn good. How can RUMORS not be considered one of the great rock albums of all time? How did Fleetwood Mac fall so far so fast? Was it because Stevie Nicks became sort of a parody of herself by venturing into a more mainstream, Saturday Night Live-type of fame? Her weird thing with Mick Fleetwood? The weird thing called Mick Fleetwood?
I guess the Eagles might have had a similar descent ... they've sort of become a bit of a joke, a guilty pleasure, but dang do they ever still have huge numbers of fans ... But must we be reclassifying Fleetwood Mac not as the legitimate rockers we thought they were, but more in league with the Styx, Toto's and Asia's of the world?
More importantly, how is that Stevie Nicks has never been seen coming out of Calamity Jane's with armfuls of purchases?...
OnShakedown (Chris Tackett) says…
Nice topic, Joel. Reminded me of what my folks used to listen to...
My dad is and always will be a 'classic rock' guy. When we were little and riding in the car, my dad would try to get us to name each artist (and eventually song) that was played on the oldies/classic rock station.
By age 12 I could pick out Fogerty from CCR and knew almost all The Doors tracks within 20 seconds. No, 20 seconds isn't game show speed, but for 12, I felt cool.
Too bad he also listened to Rush Limbaugh everyday. Talk about brainwashing....
thetom (anonymous) says…
My parents listened to Andy Williams, Dean Martin, Frank Sinatra, and ilk. My first record was "hey hey we're the monkees". The times were such, though, that I evolved into Vanilla Fudge and Blue Cheer pretty quickly.
My revenge on the world for the Disco, Punk, Rap and Country music is mp3 hour with my kids. This occurs many times a week with spill over into the car stereo. Classic rock brainwashing? Bet your ass. When my son asked me about country music, I played him "Bad Company". Hey, its about cowboys. I will, however, protect them from Stairway and Freebird as long as I can.
Sure it can be said I do them a disservice. But its better than Drake and Josh.
thetom (anonymous) says…
Lazz,
I continue to stand by the following artists who have been re-defined over the years as jokish, but were nothing of the sort at the time:
neil diamond
Chicago
Bob Denver
Fleetwood Mac (you are right about 'Rumours')
Journey
Bill Joel
The Eagles
lazz (anonymous) says…
Interesting list, thetom ... my only disagreement would be Journey -- I saw them as a joke at the time ... I would put Journey on any list that includes Foreigner ... and hey, I dug both bands, but I definitely felt a bit sleezy in the process ... And Billy Joel slammed into the I'm A Joke Wall at full speed far before present-day, with uptown girl ...
The good aspects of the floor falling out from underneath pop music in the mid-80s were a) it made room for Nirvana, Soundgarden, Soul Asylum and other angry young hard rockers at a time when Punk had failed to achieve the domination we hoped it would (MTV's first casualty, though the Punks themselves share much of the blame), and b) it encouraged many of us deepen our horizons and turn instead to blues, jazz and world music ...
lchronister (Levi Chronister) says…
Dammit, Joel. I've been meaning to post/create a "Parents' music vs. your music" meme for my blog, but now I'd just look like I was stealing from you. And I can't have that.