Posted
by Joel Mathis
July 18, 2007 at 3:26 p.m.
Just asking: UPDATED with a contest announcement
I have discovered a way to insult someone without having to take responsibility for the insult. All it takes is asking a question in an insulting way, then following up with two little words that absolve you of blame:"Just asking."As in:Is it possible that Lawrence.com commenters are the vilest, most stupid people of all time?__Just asking._It's probably always been around, but it seems like use of this device has shifted into overdrive lately. This way you get to express an opinion without really expressing an opinion. Or express an opinion in a too-coy, "Who, me?"_ fashion.Such as:[Alex Beam:][1] A New York state senator wanted to pass a law banning the use of iPods by people crossing intersections. "They are walking into speeding cars," Senator Carl Kruger told a local TV station. ... Wouldn't Charles Darwin say that is a good thing? Just asking. Oh, I forgot. Darwin's teachings have been banned in many parts of this great country. So if a bus pancakes a distracted iPod user, it is God's will.And:[Quickly's Neighbors:][2] The Hebron teacher's aide got a very lenient sentence. If that was a man accused of sexually abusing underage girls, would he have gotten the same sentence? Just asking.And:[Sporting News][3] And last but not least, if a player's worth by making all his teammates better is so highly rated, how come Kobe's team wasn't better? Uh, because maybe he doesn't make his teammates better? And if ANY team could have him (forget caps and all) how many teams REALLY want him? Just asking. All from the last few days.All of which leads me to a question:Is "just asking" becoming an overused and cliche way of passively aggressively taking a stand on an issue, any issue at all?Just asking.CONTEST ALERT!! We haven't done a summer contest yet this year. It's time.Whoever can come up with the best "Just Asking" outrageous comment - bonus points for making it Lawrencey - gets a $10 gift certificate to the Bourgeois Pig. Please keep it PG-13; I am the final judge and arbiter; the deadline is noon Friday.Another update: Dazie notices what must have been my inspiration - completely subconscious, I assure you, no plagiarism intended, at ["Get Fuzzy."][4]![][4] [1]: http://www.iht.com/articles/2007/07/17/opinion/edbeam.php [2]: http://www.post-trib.com/news/quickly/471712,pquickly.article [3]: http://www.sportingnews.com/blog/lgaylesmith/92884 [4]: http://www.comics.com/comics/getfuzzy/archive/images/getfuzzy2007062036730.gif
Comments
Lawrence.com does not necessarily agree with comments posted below - responsibility lies with the relevant user alone. Read our full policy.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
BTW, I didn't mean that crack about L.com commenters. Just trying to make a point about the rhetorical device.
El_Borak (Bill Hoyt) says…
It doesn't work if you use it and then back away with some obsequious explanation...
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Did Bill just anger me by pointing out my inconsistencies?
Just asking.
(See!)
Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
Joel man- you were owned by a cartoon cat:
http://www.comics.com/webmail/ViewStr...
Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
(I'm just sayin...)
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
'Doh. I'm sure I read that a few weeks ago, too. That's embarrassing.
Did Aileen just become my nemesis by pointing out how very unoriginal I am?
Just asking.
(See! SEE!)
Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
Joel- it must be really embarassing to have a loyal reader point out your obvious flaws.
I'm just sayin...
OR
Joel- isn't it eally embarassing to have a loyal reader point out your obvious flaws?
I'm just asking!
;)
agrabass (anonymous) says…
Another passive aggressive statement i love is, "Sorry, no offense!"
i.e. "How do you know my skirt is too short when you squeeze your size 16 into a size 9...sorrry, no offense!"
Or
"If you stay with him you are way dumber then I ever thought you could be. Sorry, No offense, but he sucks!"
mitzibel (Misty Nuckolls) says…
Heh. This is why I find that it's much easier to own up to being an offensive asshole in the first place. "Yeah, so?" becomes a valid response to the statement, "That was really mean, and ignorant, and you're a dick!" See, no passive-aggression involved.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
I use ALL these devices ALL the time. At what point is passive aggressive not passive? What makes ME such an asshole, is that I thought i invented them all. The mock passivity is the joke, in any case. Or... perhaps an indicator of humility? And if so, I proclaim partial unassholicity in many cases. Using a shorthand phrase like "Just me" in place of "Well, I feel strongly about this but I make no claim to represent the entire human race, so this is just my opinion and take it for what it's worth" is a simple gift to the bandwidth gods. I'm just saying, but that's just me.
But the REAL question is why is _this_ or *this* any better than THIS? Is the inability to construct a sentence without the crutch of surrogate italics justified in one case and not the other? Just asking.
Thats not my entry, thats just me talking and all.
This whole blog entry is like you threw a party just for me. Thanks, man. No offense.
godjilla (Jill Ensley) says…
I'm convinced there's a borg-like collective subconscious. I notice words being used in a fad-like fashion in various places at about the same time, all the time. I also construct bad sentences when it's too hot out.
The most recent one, that I can remember anyway, was "diaspora". It was everywhere a few months ago.
El_Borak (Bill Hoyt) says…
Whenever I read "I'm just askin," the B-52s' "Dance this Mess Around" pops into my head, which makes it doubly* aggravating. So thanks, Joel. If I angered you, it's only partial payback for having to endure bad 70s dance tracks chasing one another around my depressingly empty skull.
May rock lobsters infest your love shack, baby.
* because I don't know if Jilla is correct or if people are just depressingly unoriginal.
Jason (anonymous) says…
A similar tactic that really gets on my nerves:
I don't mean to be an asshole/racist/etc, but
El_Borak (Bill Hoyt) says…
Some of my best friends are asshole/racist/etcs.
Jason (anonymous) says…
Chances are then, you too, are an asshole/racist/etc.
Jason (anonymous) says…
Sorry, forgot the exculpatory modifier:
I'm just sayin'.
El_Borak (Bill Hoyt) says…
Good thing I've never denied it then, huh?
Jason (anonymous) says…
*shrugs*
I suppose it's a good thing if it turns out to be true, as your credibility remains in tact. Though I don't claim to know whether you are or not...
I'm just sayin' there's a chance...
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
I've been hearing "exculpatory" a lot lately.
"In country" is one of the most famous creations.
"At the end of the day" is a maggot on my last raw nerve.
I know these are old, but I'm just saying.
Dover (anonymous) says…
Also akin to: "Not to be a total b#*%h here, but .... (insert catty comment)." As if saying that justifies doing exactly what you're saying you're "not" doing. You may as well say, "I'm about to be a total b* here when I say this, but I'd like to exonerate myself from accountability."
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
LB: There is no more effective behavior modifier than associating the perpetrator with the B52s. Was that intentionally directed at me or should I take it personally? (Putting myself squarely (whilst giggle spitting) at the center of the universe).
Just asking.
liz (Liz Weslander) says…
Do any ljworld readers actually like the new arrangement of the paper?
Just asking.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
I got your WMD?
Just asking.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
THAT"S my entry.
Dazie (Aileen Dingus) says…
Does anyone really expect to ever go to a wedding where the bride is wearing a gown from Calamity Jane's?
Just asking.
See- that's mean. I mean- I do THINK that, but it goes against my style to SAY it like that. I'm much better with pointing out Joel's foibles vis a vis cartoon cats.
Andini (anonymous) says…
Is it a requirement for every employee that works at a trendy shop downtown to have a piercing, tattoo or both?
Just asking.
Andini (anonymous) says…
...here's another one...
When all of the people that have a lot of tattoos & piercings start having kids, what will there kids rebel against?
Just asking.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
Probably tattoos & piercings. But that's just me.
ihatejohntravolta (anonymous) says…
Here's one...
Is Calamity Jane's a front for Stevie Nicks's coke ring?
Just asking...
OtherJoel (anonymous) says…
Did I just crap myself?
Just saying.
Guess it doesn't work on everything.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
*sniff* *sniff* Or does it?
Just asking.
mrmoth (anonymous) says…
When there's a line out the door, is that really an appropriate time for Lawrence postal workers to make small talk?
Just asking.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
... and OtherJoel wins.
Self-deprecation goes a long way with me.
OJ: Didn't I already owe you a prize from another contest?
OtherJoel (anonymous) says…
Actually I thought that it would be more consistent with the spirit of the device to say "Did you just crap yourself?" But yeah -- I'll take it.
I did win a contest a while back, and you gave me a nifty l.com tee.
Andini (anonymous) says…
Was this contest fixed?
Just asking.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Is somebody jealous?
Just sayin'.
turdfurgeson (anonymous) says…
Were you the product of your mother sleeping with her cousin? Just asking.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
HEY!!!
I'm way more self-deprecating than he is.
Saying.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Dotdot: Did you just boast about your self-deprecation?
edie_ (anonymous) says…
Ihatejohntravolta,
By Stevie Nicks coke ring, do you mean her brown eye?
Rumors are (hee hee) that she hired someone on every tour to blow coke through a straw into her ass.
Bless her heart.
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
Do you think it is a single malt scotch or is it a second tshirt (to compliment the one you already owe me) that represents the proper compensation for explaining my joke?
Just asking.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
I've got a bottle of Laphroig 10-year at home I'd be happy to share...
DOTDOT (anonymous) says…
It will be my first Laphroig. Accepted.
Joel (Joel Mathis) says…
Laphroig is my favorite! We'll have to arrange a meeting. I'm five minutes from walking out the door of my parents' home for an eight-hour drive to Colorado, so posting will be intermittent from here on out. But when I get back: scotch.
godjilla (Jill Ensley) says…
Collective conscious word of the week: "commuted"
Maybe that's more a sign of the times thing though.